Is it just me, or do you also find that, when you get to know people more deeply, and in varying situations; they end up being totally different than who they originally presented themselves to be? As an out-of-the-closet idealist, I must take responsibility for my part in the fantasy, since everyone is beautiful to me. When undergoing a forensic psychological evaluation across several days, I miraculously emerged without mental illness. The only thing the simpering psychologist said was that I suffered from a Pollyanna Syndrome, which she hoped I never lost. I admittedly err in this direction, while endeavoring to balance my die-hard idealism with life-guard realism.
That said, it still seems like most people are managing our impressions of them pursuant to a premeditated plan; manipulating us to get what they want; presenting the face that finds their fancy free. Although I fully realize this, I still set myself up to be taken advantage of by the fakers, takers, and heartbreakers of this world. “Why?” you ask. Because this is who I am, and I do not want to change who I am because of the selfishness of others; I do not want darkness to diminish my light. In fact (here comes that idealism again), I am even hoping that my light will illuminate the darkness on my path. I absolutely crave giving to, loving, and helping others. As crazy as it sounds, it feels as powerful as an orgasm to me, and the feeling lasts much longer. So I definitely benefit from it too.
Self awareness increases our cognizance of other people, places, and things; and helps us see the truth behind the masks. With this knowledge, we can establish boundaries, set limits, and prepare for that which was hitherto unknown. We can still be ourselves, give and help, and get hurt in the process; but we can do it with a smile, knowing that this is us being us, trying to make a difference in the world. We can predict that there is a high probability that things are different than they seem, and still show love and kindness to boys and girls. Regardless of whether we can or cannot discern the true face behind the front, we can show them ours.
For me, the lesson here is that I would rather be burned in the course of helping others than stop doing it to feel comfortable and safe. What are your thoughts on this?
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